For Better, For Worse

Since the breakup of my marriage three years ago, I've lived one year in hell, and have spent the past two years trying to break out of that hell.  Yes, me, the strong, independent, smart woman that I thought I was, was down for the count for a full years worth of 'rounds'.  No boxing ring involved.....no bell....no referee.  Just me and this 'fear' thing hanging on my back, that wouldn't let me rest without having nightmares and panic attacks every single night. Yes, I paid dearly to ComEd for my electric bill...I couldn't sleep without the light on, or multiple lights and a TV, too.  I was always afraid!! Never did I think 'he' would leave me to deal with Multiple Sclerosis alone, $20,000 a month shot costs, lesions, spinal cord problems, yadda yadda yadda....yet he did it...left me high and dry. 

What a relief I was given at my 30th year High School Class reunion last October when I was granted freedom from that whole 'hell' thing I was living through. 

Yes, imagine it like this:  your soon to be ex was your high school sweet heart, you've been with him for 32 years, AND even worse, he brings his live in girlfriend, whom was an old friend of yours and also a classmate at our high school, to the reunion.  Ouch. It was brutal.

Anyway, I was so blessed last year, that a wonderful and STRONG group of girls from high school rallied around me for months prior to the reunion.  They were like Angels that came to rescue me, and I saw them as such!!  They were in a pretty pink box, wrapped up especially for me.  The gift tag read this:

Especially For Sonya

I love you!

Love, God

So, now as we all go through some really rough waters with health issue's, I am reminded of the blessings of these girls.  One of them is healing from a nasty surgery weeks ago to remove large fibroids, another is having some financial problems because of job losses, and yet another is in a terrible Rheumatoid-Arthritis flare up.  When I say flare up, those words don't even compare to what my friend is going through!  Feet that are so swollen she cannot put on her shoes....hands so swollen that she can't bend her fingers....and incredible pain that even morphine won't dissolve it.  I cry when I think of her pain! 

So, I'm on a mission to learn about Inflammation and Auto Immune Disorders, and what role our diet plays in the onset of these disorders.  I've stumbled upon so many great websites and blogs with some great sounding recipes and idea's, that it's almost over-whelming.  HOWEVER, it appears that our SAD (sad American diet) plays some huge vital roles in how we feel and IF our bodies get ill and diseased.  It's information that's definitely worth reading for me. 

After all, even though the 'ex husband' didn't play true to his vows of 'for better or for worse', these girlfriends of mine have walked the walk, and held my hand through some whoppers....so I will read as much as I can to help each of these girls in some small way.  Knowledge is power.  Yup, we're gonna get us some power.  :)



 

"You have brains in your head......."

....... You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go."     Dr. Suess, lol, Motivational Speaker.

I figure it's time to stop the pity party for myself and get out there and walk, whether my feet hurt or not! 

Dr. Suess says it all pretty clearly doesn't he?  He makes it sound quite simple actually.  Maybe that's my problem, over analyzing and making it MORE than what it is, SIMPLE. 

So I'll lace up my Nike's and go for a walk in this heat and humidity.  And when I get back home, I know I'll feel proud of myself, like Nike says, for 'just doing it'.  :)