Yes, this is how my brain automatically thinks. Everything is in song form. Each time I start a thought process, it ends up with some silly song that I've heard before and then the darn song plays over and over again and again in my head until a new song appears. I wonder if this is a 'disorder' listed in the Psychiatrist DSM Index ? I'll hafta check that one out sometime and get back to ya on that. I also wonder if I'm the only one that 'thinks' like this. Don't get me wrong...I'm not 'weird' or anything. I just wonder at times if my ever so slight musical background genetically predisposes me to think in 'song form', ya know? Maybe a little? (ha, if you only knew how slight that background was, you'd say nah....it don't!)
So, anyway, I wanted to warn any future readers that I actually do have several diagnostic disorders, really I do (!) and they may at times warrant you to try to decipher what I'm actually writing in a blog post. One thing I've been diagnosed with is Multiple Sclerosis. For me, it's a funny disorder that prompts me at several times during the day to actually laugh out loud at myself. Yes, at least I'm entertaining to myself and that's a good thing! If I'm not flubbing up the words that are coming out of my mouth, I'm bumping into something, or tripping over my own foot, a symptom of MS called foot drop. Basically, your foot isn't picking up off the floor as it should, so your toes, which usually come up off the floor first during a step, well, they don't. So you end up tripping over your own toes. I do that almost daily. Sometimes I'm lucky and fall into something that is soft and plush or catch myself on a wall, and other times I don't. I fall down, and then as I lay there on the ground I try to figure out if I'm actually hurt, if I should cry real tears because I am really hurt....or if I should repeat that infamous commercial. You know the one...."Help, I've fallen and I can't get up!" (Sorry...I honestly don't mean to make fun of anyone...only myself. ) :-)
So, this blogging thing for me isn't really 'new' , so to speak. I used to blog daily. Matter of fact, I was proud of the readership I had back in those days. Many things were different back then, too. I was happily married during those days to my high school sweet heart, which apparently, won't be the case anymore as of next week. The big 'D' is supposed to be final in a few days....or so I'm told.
Also, back then, I was in pretty good health and on a quest to get to the healthiest place I could be, physically speaking. Then MS struck....all hell broke loose, and here I am....five years later, almost divorced and learning new things about life, being single, being single and broke, being single and disabled, and being single. Ahh...being single. Quite a weird feeling for a girl that has been in a relationship for 3/4 of her life! Truly it is quite weird!
So, if you'll hang with me for a while, you might be entertained by me, like I'm entertained by myself.....you might learn some new things about this life we're living by another person's wacky viewpoint....or maybe I'll learn something new about this life we're living from you, the reader. After all, sharing is caring, doncha know? And I'm trying to learn this time around to be less selfish, more giving, less negative, more appreciative, less angry, and really, to take much more time to eat chocolate. After all....life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get. Eh? ~~hugs~~
